Tag: Personal Growth
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Sloppy Thinking, Part 1
Thinking about the nature of shoulds has prompted me to write also about what I call sloppy language. I have long maintained that if an individual will give meticulous attention to his or her language for six months, that individual will dramatically change his or her life for the better. By meticulous attention, I mean…
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“You should,” Part 4 (Management)
This is the fourth of four posts on the nature and management of shoulds. (Note: because Facebook does not easily allow paragraph markers, I am choosing to begin my paragraphs with … to make it easier to read — at least it is easy for me!) To recap. Shoulds are the rules of social boundaries.…
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“You should,” Part 3 (Emotional Triangles)
This is the third of four posts on the nature and management of shoulds. From Ed Friedman I also learned of the incredible importance of emotional triangles — the laws of relationships; this information changed my life. Essentially, shoulds invest energy in the third limb of the triangle, an investment that is generally dysfunctional (unless…
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“You should,” Part 2 (The Crab Trap)
This is the second of four posts on the nature and management of shoulds. Ed Friedman (as noted in the previous post, Ed was one of my primary mentors) used to tell a story about how to catch crabs in the ocean; he claimed it was true, although I have never been able to verify…
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“You should,” Part 1
A few days ago, I received a request to write about the nature of the word should, must and have to. So . . . I imagine that this is a very important topic for many people. However, it is such a huge topic that I will split my posting into several, so as to…
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A Vision of A Mature Culture
As I explore the issues of our culture, I start with Vision because it is essential to our being. As the Cheshire Cat said to Alice: “If you don’t know where you are going, any road will do.” Vision is what motivates us: we want to move towards it. (We want to move away from…
Awakening From Your Anger 